Music & Liquor

You left me. We’re through.

Probably the smart thing to do.

You never understood me 

but at least you were there.

Or ever really knew me. 

I hate that I still care. 

But  I don’t. I know I don’t.

I don’t know who I am anymore. 

Back when we met, we were perfect.

It’s weird. Then you changed me into something you didn’t like.

But I remembered how I use to roll like riding a bike.

And now I’m back. What have I done?

Could it be true? That this whole time, 

I was basing my identity on you.

I mean psychology? What a bore.

So many more unopened doors. 

I forgot about Ryan, writing, music & friends

 and living for me instead of you.

Didn’t you use to have the same problem? 

Well girl it’s a disease & I caught it.

You’re gone now so I lost it.

But what if the sickness is permanent?  

What if when I’m with a girl I forget to do me?

As long as she dosen’t, could I live my life happily?

When we were together, my friends and I were not.

When it was you vs. them, they could fucking rot.

It’s not your fault, it was mine.

I wish I had known where to draw the line.

But now it’s over & I’m getting over it.

That’s not the way things should be. 

You should’ve only been apart of it.

It being my life 

Now you’re not even a slice.

I’ve rediscovered my friends

Realized that they’re brilliant

When we’re together anything can be done. 

And with them I know I’ll always have fun.

But hey, then you say, “We can still be friends?”

And thinking back on it I laugh 

Cuz you’re not cool enough to be one of them.

You’ve lost you like I did when I was with you. 

I found me now & I’m not slowing down.

If I could I’d make this feeling my wife

Cuz in the end, writing has always been my life.